Wake up in the morning, headin' to the bar
I really need a drink before the 10th hour
Slew foot and sideways I make it through the town
My flask is empty, my head is down
Stopping at the corner, I take a little break
My bones they hurt, my head it aches
Looking for a corner to drain my little head
Fuck - but it's too late, it's running down my leg

Filthy piss-soaked monkey, thirsty for a stout
Dirty little bugger, he's wavin' it about
Others did not like this, gave him a mighty clout
"Out the fucking pub cunt!" they began to shout
Bleeding on the corner wall, he hides his shame to pout
Let this be a lesson learned - don't be a drunken lout!

Booted out of one bar, trolling for another
To get me next pint, I'd cut me own mother
Stopping at the corner to beg a little change
The bystanders flee before I get in range
Empty out me pockets to see what I can find
There's a piss-soaked twenty I didn't know was mine
I pork pies a rub-a-dub a little up the street
I sweet-talk the bouncer 'fore he smells the pee

Filthy piss-soaked monkey, thirsty for a stout
Dirty little bugger, he's wavin' it about
Others did not like this, gave him a mighty clout
"Out the fucking pub cunt!" they began to shout
Bleeding on the corner wall, he hides his shame to pout
Let this be a lesson learned - don't be a drunken lout!

Swayin' in the tea time, lookin' for that sign
Gotta get a Guiness, I really got no time
All the senses rushin' back, pannin' in my head
If I dont feed the liver fast, I'll prolly wake up dead
I have no clue of what 'n how 'n who or where I be
Help me try to stand, or get me to that tree
Never get enough, I never learn before I pay
Driftin' in a black out, the brain has gone away

Filthy piss-soaked monkey, thirsty for a stout
Dirty little bugger, he's wavin' it about
Others did not like this, gave him a mighty clout
"Out the fucking pub cunt!" they began to shout
Bleeding on the corner wall, he hides his shame to pout
Let this be a lesson learned - don't be a drunken lout